Always ask yourself: “What is my goal right now?”
When you keep focused on a specific goal, you are less likely to get sidetracked by venting your anger at someone. You’ll discover that your real goal is incompatible with losing your temper and shouting.
For example, an employer wants his employee to do a good job. Encouragement is more likely to achieve that goal than yelling. Similarly, parents want their children to learn positive values. A friendly, warm talk is more effective than angry outbursts.
By being aware of your original target and goal, you will stay focused and accomplish more.
-from Rabbi Zelig Pliskin’s book “Gateway to Happiness,” p.211