When you are faced with a challenge, you have many choices of how to view it. Some ways can cause more pain than necessary.
For example, your spouse might push your buttons more than anyone else. But you can look at this challenge as a vote of confidence from your Creator. You can say to yourself, “G-d believes in me. He believes that I can face this challenge and grow from it. If He believes that I can handle it, then I’m confident that He gave me the intelligence and emotional strength to deal with this.”
Be the best person you can be. The more difficult the situation, the better person you become by acting in an elevated way. Our purpose in this world is to keep growing and developing our character. Without challenges… our growth is limited.
-from Rabbi Zelig Pliskin’s book entitled “Marriage” – ArtScroll Publications, 1998, Chapter One, p.55